Sunday, April 19, 2009

Way Out Eastern

*** I am very critical of a guru colleague who tells his followers that the best way to learn about and understand the idea of Karma is to watch "My Name is Earl".

*** My wife chides me when I sometimes exasperatingly complain that my purpose is to "help squares realized that life is a circle".

*** Our lives are an endless cycle of birth, death, rebirth, death, rebirth, death, rebirth...think Kenny on South Park.

*** Nirvana is the bliss that attends the idea that one will never have to come back again---you know, like your parents' house for Thanksgiving.

*** It is true that Muslims, when faced with a moral dilemma, ask themselves, "What would Mohammed do?"

*** The aim of meditation is to achieve a perfect silence---an experience I know well from doing stand-up!

*** Some people , it is true, choose to meditate to the soothing sounds of nature and music. My personal preference is any Black Metal Zombie CD.

*** Unlike the Hindus, I do not believe that we are reincarnated as cows---however, seeing my fat aunt Shirley sometimes gives me cause to reconsider.

*** In meditation one seeks the Perfect Still---kinda like the one my grandfather had up in West Virginia.

*** I have seen, in the mountains of Tibet, mystics actually levitating---have you never seen the enlightened Davids, Blaine and Copperfield?

1 comment:

Author Joe Dyson said...

Why didn't Ray Walston have to go to Tibet when he levitated?