Oedipus Wreck

*** Torture memoes?? Anyone who's worked in a corporation will tell you that most memoes are sheer torture.

*** It turns out that the Pentagon consulted with many psychologists in torture techniques. I 'm sure I've seen a few of those therapists.

*** When I told one I had an inferiority complex, he soothed me. He said, I was inferior!!

*** One asked me if I believed I had super powers. I said, "No, but my uncle leaped off a tall building in a single bound!!"

*** I told him I was more powerful than a locomotive. He said, "Yeah, I've been on Amtrak too!"

*** I also told him that most women I've been with will attest to the fact that I'm "faster than a speeding bullet!"

*** He asked me if I had a desire to sleep with my mother. I told him my father didn't even want to do that!

*** He asked if I believed people were talking about me behind my back. I told him, "No. They usually do that right in front of me!"