Thank Random Chemical Chance It's Friday!

*** I saw my gig at the new club had an immediate effect on the joint----I saw the "For Sale" sign this morning.

*** My grandfather was such a macho-military type---he once got a woman pregnant just to kill a rabbit!

*** John McCain excused his mistaking of the president of Spain with Latin American leaders---"Hey, 'e-z' come---'e-z' go"--Get it? heh heh."

*** Polls indicate a major loss of support for Sarah Palin amongst Minnesota Timberwolf fans. In a related story, the Palin campaign took umbrage at a newspaper advertising, with an unfortunate typo, the showing of "Sarah, Palin and Simple."

*** India's Bollywood film industry proudly announced that shooting has begun on the story of a young New Delhi rock star---"Johny Sitar".

*** Insult was added to injury when Merrill Lynch was handed a long overdue clean-up bill from when that bull was wandering the streets of New York.

*** A spokesman for Merrill Lynch, said, in response to an inquiry, "No, as a matter of fact, we are now no longer bullish on America!"

*** Let me get this straight---these avaricious price-gougers are destroyed by their own overweening greed and have to be bailed out by the same people they're stickin' it too? Isn't that something like the Dahmer family taking up a collection from his victim's families to get treatment for Jeffery's eating disorder?

*** Somebody said to me, "You remind me of that Ivory Snow baby!" I said, "Whatdya mean?", "You're always on a soapbox!"

*** I wouldn't say the TV they bought was large, but it came attached with audience seats.