Analyze This and That

*** That high-pitched singer Lou Christie's song "Two Face Have I"?... I say, Dude, I hope you have a second voice!!.
While I'm on the subject---ok, The Four Seasons' "Walk Like a Man" ---and sound like Alvin the Chipmunk?
Okay, enough about the contemporary music scene.

*** At my age and employment status, I no longer say Thank God it's Friday---I say Thank God it's any day!!.

*** I like watching C-Span and CSN cover the House and Senate---can't beat those in real-time crime shows!!
Yeah, it's crime alright!! Usually features one perp casing an empty house under the guise of delivering a speech!

*** Uncle Murray is not only senile, but obese---when he looks down in the shower, poor guy, he still can't remember what sex he is.

*** I locked my coat hanger in my car---luckily I have my keys!

*** South Africa's Winnie Mandela has blasted her ex, Nelson for being, in her view, a sell-out and a man who agreed to political arrangemts that have left the blacks as second-class citizens---or was she talking about Obama!
Nelson Mandela hinted to the press that his former wife was just jealous because she wanted a movie made about her life called Vindictus.

*** In a show on poor Native-Americans, ne old man remembered his younger years loading Hula Hoops onto trucks.
He said "Yup, they told me to get my circles in a wagon!