*** My wife asked for two aspirins last night. I asked "Am I giving you a headache?" She said, "No, you're just making it worse!"
*** Boy, I saw a really dumb guy on Who Wants to be A Millionaire. He missed the very first question: With what three words does the Bible begin?"
*** My sister aked me how come they never talk about Mr. Metro in the history of MGM.
*** I told my wife "I'm really on a roll tonight!". She said, Yeah, so is ham!"
*** My shrink says I suffer from Autism---I'm always saying, "I ought do this" and "I oughta do that!"
*** A noted psychiatrist was recently quoted as saying that Obama does not have an integrated personality.
*** Well I just took advantage of Clunkers for Cash---they towed away my car and I gotta a cool $115---who needs the government?
Clunkers for Cash---didn't that used to be Yugo's slogan?
The One Liners #365
16 years ago
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