Wit Nits

*** Ahmadinejad of Iran says his election was "as honest and unbiased as those of US---okay, bad example!"

*** Well my pervert uncle, Sol is pressin' license plates again---he asked a woman if she wanted to see a picture of his 'pride and joy'---she said okay. He showed her a photo of his penis.

*** Isn't suicide like someone telling God, "You can't fire me! I quit!!"

*** Poor aspiring actress, Cousin Ariel. She turned down an offer to be in Hair. She told the producer, "I don't mind taking my clothes off here in your office, but I would never on stage!"

*** As far as German authors go, Hesse---that's my baby!

*** They busted the local convenience store. They were selling rolling papers---pre-rolled!

*** I could tell she was a low rent hooker---she had her first dollar bill framed on the wall.

*** I read a book about a team of therapists who were working with folks who were trying to quit smoking pot. It's called, "Keeping Up with the Jonesing"