*** I told my sister to get a thumb drive. She went out hitchhiking.
*** Next she asks me, "Didya know that the star of Wagon Train was an orphan?" I said, "What are you talking about?" She said, "I heard that during WW II many celebrities helped raise Ward Bond!"
*** The mosquito situation is bad. Our county, not having the funds to send out insecticide trucks, deployed swat teams.
*** I still bear a grudge against that English professor who gave my final paper an F. I mean, I stll maintain that the "penis" in Lady
Chatterly's Lover is a phallic symbol!
*** Regarding the tragic demise of David Carradine---well, it looks like the idea of 'death with dignity' is out the window!
*** The head of the NRA came to the defense of Michelle Obama against the critics who deplored her sleeveless gowns. "She has the right to bare arms, " he said.
*** My friend said he felt bad because he had sex with his third cousin. I said, "Well, why are you counting them?"
The One Liners #365
16 years ago
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