*** They hired a former manager of Publix to be a math teacher. He got off to a bad start, making the kids learn arithmetic by adding up a column of bar codes.
*** A group of bluenoses who object to so many women wearing tank tops said, "Why, it's as if the whole nation had Turret's Syndrome!"
*** A heretofore unknown Beatles song has been discovered about a Scottish town and its beloved professional sports team, "Elsinore Rugby".
*** In a cost cutting measure the police are hiring detectives with split personalities so they can play both good and bad cop in any one interrogation.
*** A movie theater owner fired one of his employees, an usher, for doing a poor job. He later referred to him as his "worst aisle" employee.
*** I don't know if I'm such a fan of due process anymore. My wife warned me that the process-server is due any day now.
The One Liners #365
16 years ago
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