How 'Bout a Cold One?

*** I saw a good looking chick comin' my way and said, "Hey,babe, you're right up my alley!" I was right. She hit me right in the center pin.

*** Reportedly the Port-o-San company will be changing their name to "Johnny-on-the-Spot".

*** I try not to be judgmental, but the judge said I was mental nonetheless.

*** But how 'bout that Golden Globe Red Carpet Affair---the last time I saw so many plunging necklines was during the Reign of Terror.

*** I never thought I'd see the day when an actress, in her accptance speech, would thank her cosmetic surgeon.

*** I must say I was very surprised to see Hannah Montana get a Lifetime Achievement Award.

*** Just like that Foreign Press to pick a Foreign film as best picture--- "Slumdog Millionaire"---Actually, I thought it was based on my shady Uncle Saul.

*** So far it's taking me about 5 months to read "A Brief History of Time".

*** Sean P-Diddy Combs reprised Sidney Poitier's role in "Raisin in the Sun"? This too is in the Book of Revelations.

*** I have very mixed feelings---my wife is giving me the silent treatment.