The Good Mirth

*** People who have studied Barack Obama's thinking say he tends to view things black and white.

*** With his admitted use of illegal drugs when younger, Obama may be the only president to have to pass a urine test before being inaugurated.

*** The Rock 'n' Roll Hall of Fame has announced that it will present Keith Richards with a "Lifetime Achievement Award"--- said the institution's president,"We consider it quite an achievement that he has lived close to a lifetime."

*** In a related story, the Hall of Fame said they will also admit the Cowsills, but they'll have to pay the admittance price like everyone else.

*** My doctor said I didn't have an extra ounce of fat on my body. Really about 350 too many.

*** I asked my doctor what was the best diet. He said, only eat foods that start with the letter "X".

*** I think he's a quack. He said 'No carbs! No protein!'" I said, but then I'll have NO nutrition!". He said, "Yeah, but watch those pounds drop off!"

*** And then there was the cosmetologist who enjoyed make-up sex the most.

*** Sometimes I think my wife's trying to tell me something. Her two favorite perfumes are "Opium" and "Poison".

*** I grew up in a tough neighborhood. It had a "Used Getaway Car Lot"!