Saturday Morning Post

*** Shark virgin birth? Reportedly three wise men brought the newborn gold, frankinsence, and chum.


*** Ankh---isn't that sort of a cross wearing bell bottoms?

*** Those greedy CEO"s ---these are men that should have pulled themselves up by their own chin straps!

*** At a recent society ball, the debutantes were so lovely that the men could not help but express their admiration. "It was nothing but belles and whistles," reported a society columnist.

*** Upon hearing that foreign markets were also going into the tank, President Bush promised immediate financial aid to all owners of convenience stores.

*** I made a bundle from my stocks---then I put it them in a trash bag and burned them.

*** Ever notice that a cat, no matter how long it's your pet, always regards you like you're out to get his wallet?

*** Continuing their attacks on Obama, the McCain-Palin campaign claimed that he was taught Spanish by Che Guevara. Palin also praised her supporters at a rally being "ready for action," as evidenced by the number of pitchforks and torches they came with.

*** Palin as a self-proclaimed "Hockey mom", and Red-Stater, said she never allowed her son, while playing, to cross the Blue Line.

*** Greyhound Bus, facing the financial crunch, let go all of its drivers yesterday and changed their motto to "We'll leave the driving to you!"

*** The Wall Street Journal, showing its compassion in these dire times, printed a list of the Top 100 Neediest CEO's.

*** An anthropologist, discussing the crude tools made by early man, concluded that they were "all opposable thumbs!"

*** The national debt is now so high that they need a new tally board with an extra digit space to keep pace---oops, that's not a joke!