My Saddlebags are Growin' Thin

*** Okay, I give up! Who the fuck is Kim Kardashian?? Hey, if I wanna follow people around I know nothing about, I'll join the NSA!

*** In music news, White Stripes is reportedly going on the road.

*** There's a sign over here, "Lawtey City Limits"---it sure does!

*** What's the point of people sayin' "Don't even think about it"?? You already did!

*** Well, I've finally gone green as far as transportation. Yeah, My car died yesterday!

*** The thing was towed so many times it has more miles goin' backward than forward!

*** This Swine Flu thing is clearly nothing to sneeze at!

*** Fashion consultants predict that surgical masks will be in this fall.

*** Last night my wife said she was too tired to make love. I said, "Quiet and get back on the trapeze!!"

*** Arlen Specter's becoming a Democrat, eh? At least he can continue to be vague, vacillating and cowardly with the winning side.

*** .Not many younger people know that Specter was the author of the "Single-Bullet Theory" when on the Warren Commission. Now that he's expediently jumped to the Democrats to heighten his chances of being reelected in 2010, they're calling it the Single-Ballot Theory.