*** My uncle Izzy keeps bragging about how he lives in a "Gated Community." Okay, if that's what he wants to call Bellevue.
*** I don't know, that Anne Murray song, "Can I Have This Dance for the Rest of My Life?"---sounds really tiring.
*** Chris Matthews and Keith Olbermann intrigue me---when do these guys inhale??
*** I read there's so many people losing their cars to hard times, they're changing the name of Route 66 to the Repo Bahn.
*** Okay, one of the kids in town here is not the sharpest. He killed his first deer and when his father told him to dress it out he put it in a tuxedo.
*** We don't often speak of the family tragedy. One nephew, an enormously powerful young man, accidentally killed a girl during heavy petting.
*** Well, my latest gig was an unqualified success---one critic said it was fairly successful considering how unqualified I was.
*** My sister was fired again. She was working in the photo department of Office Depot and a customer asked her to scan a picture. She took it, looked at it for several seconds, and then gave it back and charged him $5.
The One Liners #365
16 years ago
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