Jose Feliciano Navidad Anos

*** My wife got me to watch this sappy movie "April Love"---she told me it was about a Porn Actress.

*** In his continuing attempts to salvage his legacy, George Bush yesterday said that, "If there is a human race and an America 20 years from now, I believe the historians will see what a great president I was in retrospect."

*** Yeah, it really looks like the Chinese are really taking us to the laundry!

*** I saw an interesting book yesterday at the book store, " The Complete Idiot's Guide to an Eschatological, Ontological, and Cosmological Interpretation of Reality."

*** I may be changing doctors---I told him some of my jokes and he wrote an Oxycoton prescription for himself!!

*** The world's oldest person died a few days ago, 117--- it's funny how this story seems to pop up about every two weeks.

*** My cousin's a Grass Roots organizer---he's always high on grass and worried about his hair roots.

*** Hey, what's wrong with being a lazy person and being an avid moss collector??

*** They say the Devil finds work for idle hands---hey, I don't give a damn who the hell gets me a job!!

*** I don't know, just because Lionel Ritchie's wife acted like a lady only three times, that hardly seems to justify a song celebrating the fact!