Monday, August 11, 2008

A Wit Man Sampler

*** The pregnant woman who had an affair with John Edwards has refused to take a DNA test to see if Edwards is the father--- she said, "If the baby comes out with two faces and a $1200 haircut, then we'll know."

*** My wife and I have a free relationship---she understands that I've allowed her to have free will!

*** We have a good arrangement---three nights a week I go out with the boys, then three nights SHE goes out with the boys.

*** I must have shopped at the wrong Amazon website--- they delivered three very tall, muscular women to my house!

*** I have no one to blame but myself---I applied for unemployment and now I'm unemployed!

*** My son thought "Fruition" meant the fees paid at an agricultural college.

*** Is it just me or does Tyson Chicken taste like a human ear?

*** In China today, President Bush revealed that he thought the Boxer Rebellion was when Muhammed Ali refused to be drafted.

*** I wouldn't say we're far out in the woods, but the mailman mails our mail to us!

*** Ah, "The New Adventures of Old Christine." --forgotten but not gone!!!

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