"Mahmoud Ahmadinejad is sworn in as President of Iran for a second term amid protests"---says he didn’t appreciate being "sworn at while being sworn in."
"Bill Gates announced the bankruptcy of Microsoft with the tersely worded press release “Windows is shutting down...goodbye”
The two hottie hostages released by North Korea said they’re greatly relieved to be out of harm’s way. They were referring of course to their flight back with Bill Clinton.
It has been reported that Obama averages 30 death threats a day---and half of those are from folks who voted for him!
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*** The shrink said I use my humor as a defense against a world I find frightening and confusing.
I said ”Oh my GOD!! What do you mean??!”
*** I saw a book in a supermarket yesterday , “Glen Beck’s Common Sense”--- they had to make an announcement, ” Clean up laughing man in aisle five!”
*** Antioxidant pet food.--- great, now I have to worry about my dogs’ cholesterol?
*** I guess the Blue Dog Democrats have been paid and neutered.
*** I saw the 50’s trio, The Crew Cuts on one of those PBS revival shows. Only now they were called The Hairpieces.
I read an interesting story about a veterinary psychologist who was trying to get an agoraphobic tortoise to come out of his shell.
The One Liners #365
16 years ago
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