Post-it Notes

*** Okay. Is it 'Joshua had fits at the Battle of Jericho'?

*** Who knew?? I advised a friend that he should put more healthy foods into his body. Oh well, I guess those folks at ER have seen it all by now.

*** My poor late uncle Shlomo never had any luck.. Turns out he was given his Last Rites by an Atheist.

*** A black friend goes around boasting that his father was killed at Pickett's Charge---I have to tell him that being crushed during a riot at a Wilson Pickett concert uh,... no...

*** Well we tried to spice up our sex life, but my wife ruined the whole mood. After I put her in handcuffs she demanded to be read her Miranda Rights.

*** These publishing companies can be discouraging. Along with my manuscript I wrote in a cover letter, which ended with "I'm very determined to be accepted as a writer---you know what they say, "'publish or perish'"!
They were thoughtful enough to send me a list of good hospices.


*** I still don't know why that woman slapped me after asking if I wanted some Tequila. I just said, "Sure, but please hold the worm!!"

*** North Korea's Kim Jong Il better watch out for Hillary Clinton---she's had experience with missiles going off in the wrong places.