Balderol

THIS IS NEWS TO ME:
***"Two US Journalists Sentenced to 12 Years in North Korea" ---talk about cruel and unusual punishment.

• "Obama promises more than 600,000 stimulus jobs this summer"---okay, that's great for the hookers, but what about the rest of us?

• "Court rejects challenge to military's 'don't ask, don't tell' policy"---in a related story, a gay Jewish soldier told his comrades of his many homosexual experiences. "How many?" he was asked. He said "Don't ask!!"

•" British Prime Minister Brown faces showdown with rebels"---three words for Brown: George the Third.

• "Former detainee speaks out about life at Guantanamo Bay" ---said guards mockingly sang, "By a Waterboard, I'm Calling You".

• "Swaziland's only football stadium torn apart for 'magic charms'"---well, of course it's ... huh???
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During the Swine Flu scare, in order to contain the feared epidemic, police were beginning to arrest people for 'Driving under the Influenza'.

*** I read in a prominent murder trial, the sentence was suspended. Unfortunately for the defendant, so was he.

*** Investigators into the death of David Carradine think they may have unearthed a vital clue, a copy of Will Rogers' little known book, "Rope Tricks for After Dark".

*** Communications between the wife and I are breaking down. We only speak to each other through e-mails---on the same computer!