Anything Katmandu I Can Do Better

*** Yesterday I had an epiphany---that moment when one's consciousness merges with the universe. I think it was right after the third puff.
Then, I heard a great bang, and saw a bright source of light from which powerful forces rushed in toward me.
Unfortunately, the forces had police uniforms on as I yelled, "I swear, she told me she was 18!"


*** We must not be deceived by the illusion of duality: dark, light; yes, no: up, down; ---this is something we duality time!

*** My wife and I got off to a bad start, when we wrote our own wedding vows. I said, "I love you because you are me and I am you!"
She said, "Oh! Okay! Go fuck yourself then!"

*** Many gurus say that the opposite of love is not hate, but fear. I hate to say this but I fear I disagree.

*** Speaking of that oxymoron "Passive Resistance"---I always take a non-violent approach when faced with potential physical conflict. Especially when the woman's bigger than me!

*** Look for my upcoming book, "Deep Breathing Meditation Through a Surgical Mask" in stores late this month.

*** I have been asked, "Krishna Morty, is even this fearful Swine Flu divine?"
I answer, "Have I not told you that good and evil, bad and good are really the same--illusions of the ego?"
In connection with this I must pronounce my anger at those news sources who insinuate that my flying my family to Pago Pago for the next year is anything other than a long overdue vacation.

*** "Namaste" is a greeting which means 'I bow to, or see the God within you'---it's a great pick-up line!

*** This is from fellow guru, Deepak Chopra:
"You are not in the world; the world is in you. You are not in your body; your body is in you. You are not in your mind; your mind is in you. So when we say that the soul leaves a person’s body at the moment of death, it would be more correct to say that the body leaves the soul. The body is already coming and going; now it leaves without coming back. The soul can’t leave because it has nowhere to go. If you aren’t already going anywhere when you die, you must be there already".
Any questions??
My poor brother Deepak apparently had been hitting the Six-packs again.
.