They Tried to Sell Us Egg Foo Yung

*** My wife and I met each other on the rebound---and what a fierce co-ed basketball game that was!

*** I told my cousin that her hair style place would never make it with the name she thought was cute: "Perm Mutation"

*** One snooty girl I went out with looked at an older woman's clothes that were out of style. She yelled, "Antediluvian!!" I said, "Oh, are you Armenian??"

*** I promised my wife that someday we'd be livin' large. And I was right--we've both put on quite a few pounds.

*** I really took a heavy hit in the Market. A big burly guard caught me shoplifting!

*** My sister thought bobby sox were the hosiery warn by British police.

*** My aspiring actress cousin finally is making it big on Broadway. She's a hooker in Times Square.

*** To my uncle the glass is always half full---of booze!

*** I've been through tough times before. Earlier in my life I lived for two years on food stamps. Yeah, I stamped the prices on cans at Winn-Dixie.

*** The younger generation scares me. I read that they think that before 1960 the world was in black and white.